Tag: social situations

Friendshipping by Trin Garritano and Jenn Bane

- Callen Leave a comment

Most people can agree that making friends as an adult is HARD. Finding time to meet up with people, not to mention knowing what to say when you do, often means a lot of loneliness and ghosting when it comes to adult friendships. If you’re like me, you’ll be thrilled to know that you can stop googling “how to make and keep friends” and just read this great new book: Friendshipping: The Art of Finding Friends, Being Friends, and Keeping Friends. Written by Trin Garritano and Jenn Bane, the team behind the feel-good podcast of the same name, this is a practical guide to the confusing world of 21st century friendship.

My favorite thing about this book is its clear division into three sections (named in the full title): Finding Friends, Being Friends, and Keeping Friends. Each section features real-life tips and tricks for being the best friend you can be, along with specific questions submitted by their listeners. Full of empathy, their tips and tricks acknowledge that everyone is a little different, which means the tips will need to be customized, AND that making friends is a process, which requires patience. One of the keys to success, according to the authors, is to be kind to yourself through a practice called “metathinking”: listening to your thoughts and questioning whether or not they’re actually true. For example, if you find yourself thinking “I’m so annoying” or “This is going to go badly”, you’d challenge that thought and think carefully about where it’s coming from and what’s more likely to be an accurate statement.

One of the other unexpected gems in this book is the authors’ acknowledgment that sometimes we ARE the problem and need to make realistic changes. They provide tools for the reader to examine their behavior and habits to see if anything toxic or unhelpful is going on, and if the reader does come to the conclusion that their behavior is harming their friendships, the authors encourage them to seek therapy and other assistance. Warmth, inclusion, kindness, and yes, recommending therapy, are big themes in this book.

If you’re struggling with loneliness, want to do better at keeping up with people, are looking to make new friends, or feel like social awkwardness is really getting in your way, you might enjoy reading Friendshipping by Trin and Jenn. And if you love podcasts, check out all their new and archived episodes of the Friendshipping podcast on their website.

How to Chat Someone Up at a Funeral by Mark Leigh

- Stephanie Leave a comment

how to chat someone up at a funeralIf you’re looking for etiquette books for situations that go beyond how to behave at a traditional dinner party or how to address your husband’s boss when he comes over for dinner, then How to Chat Someone Up at a Funeral: And Other Awkward Social Situations by Mark Leigh might not be the book for you. This book is a hilarious guide to etiquette when you are presented with awkward social situations. While the tips you learn in regular etiquette books about the regular and traditional *miigghhtt* help you in these awkward situations, please consider Leigh’s book the way to go when you find yourself in a situation that is far from normal.

In How to Chat Someone Up at a Funeral, readers will find tips and tricks on how to deal with over 60 awkward social situations. The author doesn’t care how you ended up in any of these situations, just that you are well armed with advice to help you deal with what’s presented and that you leave with as much of your dignity and your life as intact as possible. The author includes such situations as how to break a curse, how to behave when invited to an exorcism, what to do when you suspect your girlfriend is a serial killer, what to do when challenging a co-worker to a duel, how to act when you inadvertently fart in the presence of the queen, and many, many more. I highly encourage you to pick up this book to learn more about what to do when you accidentally block a toilet at someone’s house, when you need to escape a mountain lion at a dinner party, and just like the title says, when you want to know how to chat someone up at a funeral.

This hilarious book is full of steps and tricks to remember, as well as things you should avoid doing and sometimes even checklists to see if you’re really in that situation or are mistaken about what is happening around you. I really enjoyed the breakdown that the author, Mark Leigh, gives about each situation and the only caution that I would give to readers is that Leigh is from England, so some words he uses may initially be confusing, but I found the content he presented to far outweigh his word choice.

So check out this book today and the next time you find yourself sharing a flat with a gorilla or having to bail out on a bad date with decency, know that the library has the perfect resource to help you out!