It Won’t Always Be Like This: A Graphic Memoir by Malaka Gharib

Malaka Gharib has been on my radar ever since I saw her debut graphic memoir, I Was Their American Dream, on the shelves at the library. In that book, she discusses being first-generation Filipino Egyptian American. Three years later, she published It Won’t Always Be Like This, which talks about her summers in the Middle East visiting family.  Graphic memoirs are one of my favorite forms of nonfiction, specifically when authors write about their childhoods and their families growing up. Watching the authors come to realizations about their lives is riveting, yet also heartbreaking. I was excited to start It Won’t Always be Like This to see what Malaka Gharib had to say.

Malaka Gharib’s childhood was a bit rocky. Her mother is Filipino and her father Egyptian making Malaka Filipino Egyptian American, plus first generation! Her parents divorced when she was young. Her father eventually left the United States and moved back to Egypt. Sha always thought that her father would eventually come back to the States, but every time she visited, he seemed to have settled into his new life even more.

Her annual summer vacation trip to Egypt when she was nine changed everything. On this trip, her father announced that he had remarried. Malaka now has to navigate her space in her father’s new family. She spends the next fifteen years traveling back to Egypt to visit her father and his growing family. Those years are rough. She is navigating adolescence both in America and in a country where she doesn’t fully understand the religion, language, or culture. She is constantly reevaluating how she fits into her father’s new life. Malaka doesn’t look anything like her siblings (they are fair-haired) and she sticks out. The longer she spends with them, the more Malaka starts to adapt. She opens up to new experiences, new food, new music, and starts to see that Hala, her new stepmother, isn’t actually that different as she thought. She’s actually a bit like Malaka. Seeing Malaka’s childhood memories expressed through an adult lens shows how powerful our memories are in helping form ourselves and our relationships with other. It is all messy and complicated, yet necessary.

The Way, Way Back

waywaybackThere comes a point in most people’s lives when they begin to realize that they’re finally an adult.  For me that moment came the first time I re-watched Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and I realized that I sympathized more with the adults and Ferris’ sister than Ferris.  Since that day, I’ve noticed a trend in my entertainment sympathies.  I watched Easy A and my favorite characters were Olive’s parents (hilariously played by Patricia Clarkson and Stanley Tucci). I’ve been re-watching The Cosby Show, and my affinity has swayed from Theo to Clair.

So when I watched The Way, Way Back, I was expecting the same.  Written and directed by Nat Faxon and Jim Rash*, the writers of the Oscar winning The Descendants screenplay, this is a smart, funny movie about the pain of growing up and the fear of becoming the wrong kind of adult.  Liam James is remarkably and heartbreakingly convincing as Duncan, a 14-year-old spending the summer with his mom, Pam (Toni Collette) at her boyfriend Trent’s beach house.  Trent, played by a surprisingly unlikable Steve Carrell, is the aforementioned wrong kind of adult.  He is obsessed with the “supposed to” in life, caring more about things and image than people.  When Duncan finds a job at the local water park, he begins to meet people that have chosen a different path toward adulthood (and have reached it in varying degrees).

There are a lot of reasons to recommend this movie.  The supporting cast — Sam Rockwell, Maya Rudolph, AnnaSophia Robb, Rob Corddry, Amanda Peet, and the scene stealing Allison Janney — is fantastic, and the movie is hilarious.  But I loved the movie because of how much I cared about Duncan.  Teens are often portrayed as arrogant and reckless or completely socially inept nerds, but most kids live somewhere in the middle.  James’ performance and Faxon and Rash’s writing helped give me a chance to root for the teen again, which is almost like reclaiming my youth.

I’d recommend this movie for fans of Little Miss Sunshine, Crazy Stupid Love, or Adventureland.

*The Dean from Community has an Oscar!